Our final game

My WWF game with ET ended early this morning. If you remember, I initiated the message saying we should finish it because I had a good rack and didn't want to waste it (puh-lease), but really because the thought of never talking to him again makes my stomach sink. I got a little ping at the very end, which meant he had sent me a message. For the record, I trounced him and almost reached 500 points in the process. Anyway, 10 months of pinging has made me positivley Pavlovian. The moment I heard it and saw the little green tear drop (which contained his chat) my heart raced and my hands got slightly clammy and I was tripping over myself trying to open it. But Murphy's Law had other plans. The message wasn't there. I mean, it was there but I couldn't see it.

Here's how I should have reacted:

I shouldn't have cared an iota what he said. Possibly he said, "good game." Or, maybe he said, "I made a mistake, let's talk." You know why I didn't care? Because people who let you down continue to let you down.

Unfortunately, here's how I did react:
WHILE AT WORK, I immediately deleted the app and reloaded it. Then, I impatiently tapped my fingers while it downloaded, then quickly found our finished game, clicked on the chat feature, scrolled all the way down to see what he said, held my breath when I saw it, and then hated myself immensely because it turns out he didn't say anything. He had sent me a frowny face.

And there has been no rematch request, so I'm sure he felt every ounce of the awkwardness that I felt during our final game. 

I'm seeing a play with a friend tonight. It'll be hard but I'll try to be a normal person around her instead of this neurotic beast that I've sadly become.